On Reading Dennis Prager

I am doing something that I should probably do a lot more often – reading something with which I am pretty sure I will disagree. Since reading only works by people with whom you agree leads to a closed mind and groupthink, I am reading Happiness is a Serious Matter by Dennis Prager. A friend of mine, The Artist, loves Dennis Prager and is always recommending this book to me and until now, I have always politely declined. The Artist and I don’t agree about much of anything political so I blew off his recommendation as an attempt to show me the glories of libertarianism. Sorry, been there, done that. He got a mutual friend to read it and she loved it so much that she actually bought me a copy. At this point, I felt obligated to read it. Prager is a libertarian type conservative and a staunch advocate that the basis of our society is traditional judeo-christian values. I did not expect to agree with him about much, but so far I actually like some aspects of his book. We are never going to agree religiously, but we may not end up too far apart on the nature of happiness. I did not expect that. Feel free to remind me that I need to keep an open mind the next time I tell you I am not going to waste my time reading something written by a conservative. Unless it is Ann Coulter - some sacrifices are just too much.

Tired of Arguing

Something I am struggling with is how to be reasonable and civil with people who have no intention of responding in kind.

It addition to coming from a very conservative family, I work in a very red industry in a very red state. This often brings me into conflict with others. On the plus side, I have grown past the point where I need to argue about politics or religion with anyone who would hold still for it. My current frustration is that I can't figure out how to get people to agree to disagree once they find out we are not in accord.

Continually, I find myself in conversation that begin with something like, "what do you mean you don't believe in God". A co-worker in the next office over cannot understand why I keep asking her not to quote scripture at people when we are in a common setting. I truly do want to be polite and respect the viewpoints of others even when I strongly disagree with them, but I keep getting backed into a corner and I can only repeat, "I don't really want to get into that right now" so many times. This same co-worker and others will often inform other people of my political views, people with whom I would never bring up either politics or religion. I have been called a communist and a flag burner by some of these people. I have gone to far as to tell one person that I would be happy to talk to him when he wants to discuss business, but I will not discuss the election at all. Requests to cease this behavior have not been successful.

I am not afraid to defend my views, but I don't want to be badgered about them all the time either. What really sets me over the edge is these same people will then tell me how rude liberals are and that all we do is call people names, with no ideas of our own.

I know this blog is technically public, but I consider this spiritual development I am going through to be very private. I have never told anyone at work or in my extended family about it because I don't want to have to defend it. How can I get the message through to these Christian and conservative crusaders that I don't want to argue with them, but I also do not want to be preached at? Has anyone had any success with this?

Liberals vs. Conservatives: Dueling Moral Frameworks

Miller-McCune Magazine has an interesting story of the different moral codes used by liberals and conservatives. An abbreviated version is on the web here, but you'll have to read the paper copy to get the long form. A psychologist/ethics professor at the University of Virginia, Jonathan Haight, is himself a liberal atheist, but his latest research is on how liberals and conservatives view and use morality.

It's insightful and a good reminder to stop and consider issues from the other point of view. You don't have to change your mind, just see where they are coming from. It was telling that conservatives often understand liberals better than the other way around.

I'm for anything that helps us all realize that those who disagree with us are not necessarily monsters. My question is, that if half of the country disagrees with the other half on such basic fundamentals, how do we ever move forward?

People often ask me, how did I become such a liberal when I started out as a Reaganite, and I usually say becoming a mother had a lot to do with it. This article helped put things in another perspective for me, that the values of harm and justice did not work with the old labels any longer. Most of the people I admired were liberals and that helped to shape my moral framework. Much thanks to my folks for letting me watch all that Star Trek as a kid.